Here we go – TRIGGERED!!!! Did you read the home page? Is it not blatantly obvious this is a joke? Either way, the clear answer is NO, what we send are 100%, brand new sex toys.

Also, they are not “our” sex toys. They are handed to us by our postman. The dirty bastard seems to have hundreds of them.

Sorry, let’s get back on point, seriously, as mentioned, our pranks only includes brand new sex toys. At no point will they ever come into contact with any orifices of any kind at UST HQ. We’re pretty sure there are websites out there that offer those sort of “used sex toys” but that’s incognito search in Duck Duck Go, ya filthy animal.